Issues of "women's studies" courses

--Long disclaimer--
I acknowledge that people have different styles of learning and handling life situations. I also acknowledge that in any given classroom, professors have to work with a wide range of student abilities and levels of familiarity with a subject. At my university, I am cognizant that in order to meet student quotas, graduate level classes have to be open to undergraduates, masters students, and higher level phds. And I fully realize that the course I signed up for is entitled "foundations of women's studies" so I might not get quite as deep an analysis of gender as is possible.
--end disclaimer--

I'm done with women's studies classes. I thought the first course was a fluke, that this one based in philosophy would be better. I thought that taking from a sociologist might equate more theories of the interaction of gender in society. I was assured that this would give me the base knowledge I need to write an articulate dissertation.

But what I've found, at least at this university, is that regardless of the course or professor, students equate the field of women's studies to "let's talk about our feelings" or "let's vent about sexism in the media." I agree, the tradition of burqas in Afganistan is an interesting tradition. Yes, the super bowl displays gendered stereotypes. But I would really prefer we discuss the readings. The readings that I spend *hours* pouring over, writing notes and summaries to ensure I understand what a *sociologist from Australia* has to say about gender. [The book is problematic-- it's a 200 page literature review of gender in academic studies in the past 100 years, and it throws out so many theories per page, it's dense and very difficult to gain anything from.] I don't come to class to be asked "well what do you think about [insert vague subject from book]" and then have it lead back to someone's venting of life.

I'm here to learn about performative gender studies and to know the various scholar's theories on gender throughout history (preferably American but I'll not be too terribly picky at this point). I sign up for women's studies courses because I have a foundation in feminist musicology, but not in Judith Butler. I can't completely rattle off the waves of feminism's major players or dates. I am about to write a dissertation that postulates a theory of gender in music, and I'd like to have a groundwork in feminist theories. I want to go through all the philosophies of gender to make sure I'm incredibly articulate and considering all perspectives when I say these figures of femininity were performing their gender, exhibiting popular ideals of society for their female audience, creating a female musical experience.

I'm passionate about digging deeper because that has been my critiques (when I get them) from scholars outside of this university. That I don't have enough theory and philosophy to back up my claims. So women's studies department.... Let's talk about philosophy. Help me understand. No, thank you, I can read on various feminist blogs about the controversy with young girls and legos. And I do that all the time-- read feminist blogs. Every day in fact. But that's pop women's studies to me, and I am in need of something more. In my mind, a graduate level course should move past "this is how I feel as a woman, and things make me angry sometimes." Sure, an undergraduate class might require that sort of emotional release. Female students at that level need to be exposed to women/gender of various conditions. But if you are touting your course as for graduate students, let's move past emotion.

Now this post makes my class out to be the worst thing ever. It has opened my eyes to new theories on gender (by in large from the textbooks). And some of the discussions have been remotely helpful in expanding my definitions of gender research. It is a million times better than my previous women's studies course 3 years ago. But I still feel like I could have gotten all of this information from reading the textbook.

Must I continue to be self-taught in this field? Because I really don't have a problem doing so. I'd just prefer if people don't turn down their noses when I say that all that I've learned on gender I've had to read and process on my own. The first class meeting asked us to expand our defnitions of what is feminism. And consequently I readily accept that I am, in fact, a feminist. Musicologist, that is. I'm sorry America. I'm not the angry feminist you might want to box me in as. I don't scream out frustrations about the patriarchy. Because that's not going to do me any good. I am going to continue to try to grasp what it means to be an American woman in any era, and then apply that to my musicological research. My advocacy is not for the slut walks. It's for more female scholarship at the national conferences. And I'm going to continue to do my part. With or without this university's women's studies department.